Today is Monday, 12/24/07, Christmas Eve. I am getting ready to enter the hospital to prepare for surgery on Wednesday. I feel like I am in perfect health, just as I have felt for almost all of my life. In fact I'm about to go to the gym, actually in the mood for it, and those of you who know me, will know that mood doesn't strike very often. It must be the knowledge that I will have an excuse for not going for some time after surgery.
I think it helps to enter the hospital feeling healthy, as I have for four previous surgeries. Never mind that I am not healthy as my recent history proves. In July I had an adrenal tumor removed, it had taken over the left adrenal gland, and both tumor and gland came out. The surgeon saw the cancer when he operated, the biopsy confirmed the finding of adrenocortical cancer, and subsequent scans have shown the spread of cancer. It is hard to conceive, but all the while I have felt perfectly fine, probably as well as anybody reading this.
Since July I have been to four oncologists, including those at Sloan Kettering Hospital in New York City and the National Institute of Health (National Cancer Institute within NIH) in Bethesda, Maryland. Opinions of treatment have varied, and I had to choose who and what to believe and choose the treatment that would give me the best option for stopping or at least slowing down the spread of cancer. The surgery scheduled for Wednesday, December 26 at NIH includes removal of 1 kidney, spleen, parts of pancreas, colon and diaphragm. It sounds like a major part of my body, but I am assured that I can live normally without all these organs or parts of organs. It is an aggressive option but maybe my best chance to have more years of life with the quality of life I have been accustomed to.
This is my first attempt at a blog, I thought it would be difficult, but my niece Paula did the work for me, e-mailing the set-up from Taiwan where she and her husband Ted are living and working for 2 years. I resisted the idea, but it turns out that Paula was right, it is easy, and it seems to be a good way to speak my mind. I've never been accused of being shy, and this seems like a good way to share information, feelings, fears.
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41 comments:
I think it's a great idea--the web log, I mean.
(And here's hoping you'll be posting for many, many, many healthy years to come.)
Amen to that. As one of Alex's friends from elsewhere on the Net, I wish you and your doctors the best of luck and even better hunting!
Hi, I found my way here through your nephew Alex; and I wanted to add my voice to those of your other well-wishers. It sounds like you've thoroughly considered your options and chosen well. Hope everything goes well. -Ellen
Hi, I'm here by way of Alex to wish you all the best in the time to come...
Peggy
Larry - I was directed here by a friend (Alex Jay as my wife and I call him), and I look forward to your posts and following your progress. You've got our best wishes and support for your battle, even though it sounds like you've got quite the high-tech army on your side.
Keep us updated, and hit 'em low and hard.
Fight.
When you think you can't, fight harder. Take comfort in your family. Enjoy every sandwich.
2008 belongs to you. Take her.
Blogging has helped me through a spectrum of experiences. Here's to good health care and to recovery.
Cancer sucks. I've had a couple of kinds, and it ALWAYS sucks. Hospitals also suck. Except for the reading time, the broth, and the jello.
I learned to value the hospital visits for THOSE things. The rest was temporary. It's always temporary.
Hang in there. You have people supporting you. And we won't go away.
All best,
James
I think this will be a good vehicle for you to vent your feelings (better than a journal) because you can see how not only those who know and love you, but people who don't know at all can send you their good wishes. Also, it's a way of not having to repeat the same things over and over to different people.
Hey, Alex sent me over here too. I'm following another friend's discovery and treatment for her adenocarcinoma in her blog, so I'm very curious about how your cancer treatment differs from hers. (Hers is not fixable; neither surgery nor radiation are options. She's going through chemo, though.)
Much, much luck with everything, and like zebrapix said, FIGHT.
Hi - I met you a couple of years ago in Tennessee at a regatta Paula and Ted were competing in (I'm the friend from Nashville). Very much enjoyed that day with you.
Wishing you strength and good surprises in 2008,
Peg
Hi, here by way of both Alex and Paula to say hello and wish you well.
I hope you enjoy this blogging lark. It can get quite addictive if you let it...
Here via Alex to wish you luck. You'll find strength you never knew you had, and you will get through this.
You don't know me, but I'm sending positive energy your way.
Hi! I saw Alex's post about your new blog and had to come by and send you good wishes and healing thoughts. I hope your surgery went well, and you're fast on your way to recovery! Keep strong in your heart and never lose hope. We're rooting for you!
Hi, I'm a friend of Paula's (the female half of the couple she visited in Denmark) and am here by way of her blog. Just wanted to let you know I'll be thinking of you.
Maria
You do not know me, but I know of you, via Paula; she told me about you.
All good vibrations wafting over to you and to Taiwan... Hospital sucks, I agree
Grada (from the Netherlands)
Good luck to you, Larry, I hope you heal quickly from your surgery and continue to feel well. From a well wisher, a friend of Paula's.
Diana Birchall
Larry,
I'm an online friend of Alex and a big hater of cancer. My only advice is that you lean on your friends and family. Be with them, and know they need you. Oh--and keep writing.
Best wishes,
Douglas Harrison
best wishes from Bangalore. blogs are great for connecting to the whole world.
Hi Larry,
I'm a friend of Paula's. A firm believer in paying it forward, my blog and the people I've met through it (including Paula) literally saved my life. So welcome. Welcome to blogging and the amazing globe-spanning gang of friends that comes with it.
Hope you're back on your feet quickly after your surgery and the news that follows is positive.
Happy New Year. ~LA
http://la-the-sage.diaryland.com
I came by way of Paula in Taiwan, and have added you to my prayers for healing. It's the day after your surgery now, so I wonder how you have done. Best of luck with the big fight...
Hi Larry, I'm a friend of Paula's. I wanted to offer my best wishes and good thoughts for you.
I found your blog through your niece Paula. Good thoughts/vibrations/prayers are going to you as you enter this new adventure of your life. It's hard to know what words might be encouraging, uplifting, amusing or comforting, but please know that if I knew the right words, I'd say 'em. All the best!
Hi I'm a long-time friend of Paula's via the journal-thing. I even met you once at the brewhouse just off the Capital in DC, I think. I'm so sorry you're going through this. Will keep you in my prayers. I'm glad you're journaling even if it took such circumstances... Best wishes to you. Jenn
Here via Paula's blog. I wish you the best of luck and good news in your health situation.
I'm here through Paula too. Well wishes and positive thoughts are being sent your way from Northern VA.
Any friend of Alex has my full and complete support, at least as much as I can send through electronic phlogistion. Best wishes to you, and a note that the only thing I know for sure in life is that nothing is impossible.
Hi, Alex Jay directed me here. He and I both frequent a web site for readers of Harlan Ellison, a writer whose most consistent and important theme through the years has been this: you are not alone. That, in a nutshell, is what I and others here have stopped in to tell you. You've got some challenges ahead of you, but you're not alone.
Best wishes,
Steve J.
I'm a blog friend of Paula's, and found my way here from her blog. Wishing you well on your journey.
Paula has been my on-line friend for several years, and that's how I found out about you. Cancer is a nasty business, no matter what kind. The love and support of family and friends is part of the therapy. I told people -- perfect strangers, friends of my kids, etc. -- all prayers and good wishes gratefully accepted. The beliefs of the "wisher" don't matter. Please accept my prayers for you to feel better.
hi,
I met Paula on-line, she wrote about what happened to you. I want to let you know I am so sorry to hear it. I wish you much strength with whatever life is going to trow at you, hold your loved ones thight.
greetings from Amsterdam, Rowena
Larry, I also hate cancer. A lot. Please kick cancer's butt, okay? Best of luck to you.
Judy
Larry, best wishes for a speedy recovery. Sounds like you've picked the best possible people and best course of action. I'm sure we're all looking forward to sharing and reading about your road to a long and productive life.
Hi I'm another internet friend of Paula's who'll be thinking of you through 2008. Keep on blogging!
Kate in the UK
Hi Larry-
Paula directed me to your blog. I hope your surgery went well and your recovery is smooth. It is amazing to think that your body can spare so many pieces, so cheers to the amazing human machine!
Keep writing.
Sarah
I'm a friend of Paula's, and saw her note about your blog. Thinking strong healthy thoughts for you. Keep writing!
Here via Paula. Best of luck with your treatment. Blogs are good ways to keep in touch with the world and to vent - both useful. You can read what you want to and write what you need to.
Good luck!
Richard
Though I don't personally know you, I send many good thoughts and loads of positive energy your way.
I came here via Paula, and I just wanted to say how sorry I am to hear that the surgery didn't go as planned, but I hope that the chemo treatment beats the cancer entirely. Very best of luck to you; I'll be holding you "in the light."
Larry,
Glad your blogging. Good to see so many comments. Look forward to some posts...and don't forget the pictures. I hope you use the level of detail in your posts that you do on the phone.
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